I was sitting on the subway minding my own business, when this Rastafarian Jamaican (R.J.) dude approached me. I didn’t know he was talking to me since I had my ipod blaring to avoid any inconveniences like these. I then took off my headphones when I realized he was pointing at his ear in a way to say, “Hey, take off your headphone for a second”, so I did. (I apologize in advance for the terrible Jamaican accent impression through text.. use your imagination lol)

Me: “What?!”
RJ: “Hay der preedy laday. How are you dooin today?”
Me: “Ok, you?” (why me?!)
RJ: “Ok. I saw you sitting der and had to introduce myself. Do you have a mon?”
Me: “Yup. I do….” (even if i didn’t I would’ve said, “yes”)
RJ: “How about I take you to Red Lobster, and treat you to a nice meal? I bet your man doesn’t treat ya like dat.”
Me: “Hahahahaha…” (Red Lobster?! Is that the best you can think of?! Shit, maybe if he said Chili’s I’d have said yes… Yeah right… not in a million years.)

At this point in time, thank god my stop came. I said, “Have a nice day” and exited.

–submitted by M–

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